I was sitting with a client recently who kept asking a question many of us have asked at some point in our lives:
“Why does what I want never seem to work out for me?”
He shared feelings overlooked for growth at work, frustrated with finances, and discouraged in his relationship. Despite being dependable, hardworking, and committed, he felt like he couldn’t catch a break — like no matter how much effort he put in, nothing was moving in his favor.
This isn’t a rare conversation.
Different people. Different stories.
But the same question always surfaces: Why me?
And truthfully, it’s a question I’ve asked myself before, too.
When life feels like it’s not aligning, it’s easy to assume we’re doing something wrong or that we’re being overlooked, dismissed, or passed by. In work settings, many people feel that ethics and effort no longer matter — that advancement is about who you know, not how you show up. That realization can be disheartening, especially for those who lead with integrity.
But when we ask “Why me?”, there are several ways to explore that question — without self-blame and without judgment.
Sometimes it’s worth looking inward:
- How are we truly showing up?
- Are we advocating for ourselves?
- What sets us apart beyond effort alone?
And other times, it’s not about effort at all.
There are moments when paths are blocked for our protection.
A role we desire may come with stress we don’t see yet.
An environment may require compromise that costs us peace.
A relationship — romantic or platonic — may be draining us more than we realize.
The same applies to relationships. Knowing when to hold on — and when to let go — is one of the hardest forms of growth. But sometimes releasing a connection creates space for alignment elsewhere. One area of our lives can quietly block growth in another.
When we ask “Why me?”, we’re often grieving paths that were never meant for our well-being.
The invitation is to pause.
To look with clarity — not just emotion.
To listen with awareness — not attachment.
Sometimes the answer isn’t hidden.
We’re just looking through the lens of desire instead of discernment.Remain thankful.
Trust that even the smallest redirection can support transformation.
What feels like a delay may actually be protection.
What feels like loss may be making room for elevation.
